That little wussy thing we have in our kitchens that we call a microwave? Pshaw! It's nothing more than an appliance that heats, reheats, and pops. If you don't require a leaded room and an apron to cover your naughty bits, then you aren't really a microwave. Can a meal be prepared in 30 minutes or less? This book says it can. For the record, in the time it took me to scan and crop, I could have made a seven course meal by this 30 minute standard.
|The countdown with random numbers is riveting. What happens after 16:45? I need to know!!|
|See what makes it happen so fast? The faster-than-light meat whacking and stirring. Since I opened myself up to those with a dirty mind, I'm going to proceed to the next picture.|
|For successful microwave dinners in half an hour, you need crumbs and lots of crumbs. Plus things to make more crumbs. In the refrigerator, it's going to be so stuffed with ingredients there will be no room for leftovers. Who wants to reheat something that originated in a microwave? I think I remember when tater tots came in a box and not a bag.|
|The need for crumbs cannot be overstressed here. All but the tuhds and weenies have crumbs, lots of crumbs.|
|The brussels sprouts knew their fate was sealed as they watched in awe at the giant meat hovered over them.|
|This is realistically what a hamburger patty would look like on the inside if prepared in a microwave. They just can't shake the parsley garnish of the previous decades. Old habits die hard.|
|One thing I can say about rice. At first it does look like rice. But if I say it looks like maggots, that's what it's going to look like. Maggots. Wriggling maggots.|
|Spinach Lasagna. The funny thing about lasagna, is that it usually has noodles in it. This has crumbs in the recipe. Plus two cups of creamed cottage cheese. Maybe this should have been a layered something or other. Those are coming up.|
|Veal with sour cream sauce. I'm going to shudder once, think of gagging, and move on.|
|Lamb Meatballs with Dill Sauce. Sometimes I can read the ingredients and think that it sounds normal. But then I see the picture and my mind reconsiders.|
|For those who can photograph food to make it look artistic, great. However, a piece of sausage just doesn't seem like it needs an extreme close up. Does anyone want to see the chunks of lips and assholes and can consent to eating it?|
|This could be a severed limb coated with slivered almonds and mushrooms. Or it could be a mutation from the gamma rays and it's off to consume humanity.|
|Well, well, well..New spin on an old classic. A salmon ring with frozen mixed vegetables and a warmed catsup (not ketchup) sauce. I bet the microwave and everything else cooked in it smells like salmon.|
|I'm going to ignore this swiss egg and focus on the rubbery cheese. No, I can't forget it. Who thinks this would work? Cooking 8 eggs in the microwave and expecting them to scramble right? Maybe I just suck and haven't embraced the beauty behind having my own little nuclear (not nucular) reactor in my kitchen.|
|Not even the maggots want this shitty excuse for beef stroganoff.|
|What's for dinner tonight? Layered Casserole or I'm going to kick it up a notch and make Four Layer Dinner. Or maybe I'll just not go through the 30 minute effort. Didn't Domino's used to deliver in 30 minutes?|
|Creamed Spinach. It's just so white. It almost goes back to the days when food was just so white.|
If there is anyone who has cooked meals like this in a microwave or has eaten them, Please feel free to comment! I love a good comment.
My 50th post is next. It's been an interesting and somewhat disgusting time. Keep reading, keep enjoying, and if anyone has any ideas about what I can do for the magical #50, please submit either via email or comment.
Thanks for the constant inspiration.